Life's A Puzzle with A Missing Piece

      Okay, so today I decided not to post a story, but rather kind of an update on what's up in my life. I'm pretty sure Jacob is the only one who reads my blog....but whatever. I'll send this post out into the endless void that is the internet anyway.
     Everything right now is really confusing and complicated. Well, not everything, but a lot of stuff. But it's mainly kind of social stuff and school related. There's a bit of family stuff, but that's not really relevant. So I guess this is my first rant about what's up in my life. I hope this doesn't bore you too much.
     Anyway, right now, things between Noah and I have been kind of tense(ish). Things have been kind of seem to be up and down for us right now. It's not like we're fighting or anything like that, but we don't seem to be talking as much anymore as we used to. We have talked a couple of times about some of our "problems," and that went pretty well I suppose. But that talk doesn't seem to have change much of anything. During our frees and stuff, I mainly talk to Jacob and Mathieu, granted Mathieu isn't absorbed in the world of Minecraft. Noah seems to be more interested in other things at the moment, which I completely understand. I don't want to be that girl that wants to constantly be her boyfriend's top priority. I know that I can't be a top priority, because that's not fair to Noah. He has other things that he needs to concentrate on like school work, his music, and his other friends. I completely understand that because I have things I have to do too. But right now it seems like unless we're alone, he acts more like a good friend, except for the occasional kiss on the head at the end of the day. Again, I don't want to be that girl that wants all of her boyfriend's attention. But as of now, I feel like I'm barely getting any. So is it really wrong to want a little bit?
     Right now, I feel like of stuck. I kind of feel like this relationship is living moment to moment. Like most of the time, we act like just friends and then there is that one occasional/special time (when we're alone) that we act like a couple. I don't know what exactly I want, but I wish something would change. But I don't think it will. If there is a change, I doubt the effects will last very long. I feel bad bothering various people with this, so this is the last rant about this for a while. Anyway, that's just how I'm feeling right now about my relationship and bugging people. I've probably bored you to tears by now, talking about my life. Sorry about that. You can now go back to your non-complicated lives. Enjoy them!


Part 2 will be posted at some point